Private Time with Dad

My son Isaac taught me a form of ritual. When he was about six I asked him, what do you think you should do when life feels complicated? Without any hesitation he said, “sit down, think, ask for help.” It is a process for both personal and communal learning that has taught me much.

Yesterday, I walked with my daughter, now 13. It was a “private walk with Dad.” We are vacationing, “holidaying” in Canada with grandparents and cousins. I wanted to make sure we had some time. My daughter so much relished the time. Her life, questions, stories were pouring out of her. We walked among the trees of this little town, Fairmont BC. We went to a favorite place, by a stream. I picked up two small stones. At the end of our walk I gave her one and called it a “truth stone.” It was a simple invitation, a simple symbol to invite our truth telling and witnessing with each other, whenever needed. It was one of those moments when my daughter and I just clicked in a great mix of laughter and seriousness.

Tenneson Woolf
tenneson@berkana.org


Sitting and Thinking photo by funkypancake
This is a Stone by Julio Martinez

How Lucky I am to Be Alive

Putting one's hand in a bucket of ice or just holding an ice cube helps with being stressed out. It immediately brings you back into your body. And it makes me think about warmer things. On a similar note, I often go to my window in the morning as I'm setting my intention for the day, thanking the creator for this precious human life. Sometimes I put my hand on the window and notice it's coolness. Then look out to see the sun bringing light into the day. Both of these actions remind me of humanness and how lucky I am to be alive. They help me to remember my connection to self and others and to our planet. My breath deepens and my body relaxes.

~Anonymous

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Minimum Daily Dance Requirement - One Whole Song Every Day

Two of my favorite daily self-care rituals:
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1. My "MDDR" (Minimum Daily Dance Requirement). This is my tongue-in-cheek version of the "MDR" acronym, which stood for Minimum Daily Requirement in regard to vitamins and minerals). My MDDR is to dance at least one whole song every day. Just to be sure it always happens, I do it first thing upon rising in the morning. I love it!

2. "Three Nice Things." A while ago, I read about an experiment where participants (who were challenged by depression) took time every night to write down three nice things that happened to them that day. They also wrote about why they thought those things happened. The study found that this writing exercise markedly decreased symptoms of depression, and even after the participants had stopped doing the writing exercise for three months, the positive change in their mood still remained.

I thought that sounded like a great idea, depression or not. However, I didn't want the pressure of having to analyze the nice things that happened, and it felt like work to have to write anything down before bed. So I came up with my own version of the exercise.

Every night before I go to sleep, I think about three nice things that happened that day. Most days I remember many more than three things, but three is my minimum. Next, I think about three (or more) things I can do tomorrow that I know will make me and/or someone else feel good (the latter having the bonus of making me feel good as well, of course).

When I wake up the next morning, I don't let myself get out of bed until I do the ritual again. That is, I review the previous day and remember three nice things that happened. These can be the same things I thought about the night before, or different ones. After that, I think about three things I can do that day to make the day nicer (again, these can be the same things I thought about the night before, or different ones).

After doing the "Three Nice Things" ritual for while, I got hooked, because it's a sweet thing to do before and after dreamtime. I also noticed that it seems to help me go to sleep, which is a bonus. And it's a double bonus to drift off to sleep every night while thinking about nice things!

Over time, I've noticed that this simple ritual seems to be changing my ongoing daily thought patterns at deep-brain levels without further "efforting" on my part. In particular, I've noticed that my overall sense of gratitude and my focus on what's working (as opposed to what's not working) have both greatly increased. I mean, I've always been a grateful sort of person since I was a child. Even so, I strive to be even more appreciative of everyone and everything--and one of my goals in life is to experience gratitude as a constant state.

"Three Nice Things" has helped me tremendously in this regard, so I've made it part of my daily (and nightly) rituals for self-care. I don't know if my version of this exercise would have the same effect on another person's focus and "gratitude barometer," but who knows? Maybe the ripple effects for someone else might transport them to other equally lovely dimensions of life!

Cat Saunders
www.drcat.org

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Thank You For the Wonderful People in my Life

The thought just came into my mind about a ritual of mine. Thanking whatever spiritual beings that surround me for the wonderful people in my life!!!!!!!! I feel that I should never take them for granted and should let my spirits know!!!!!!!!

Another ritual........I do many things that incorporate the number 8.

~Anonymous

I Take Breaks to Breathe, Rest My Mind and Eyes

Waking and sitting on the porch before I start my day, feeling the air, listening to birds, noticing how I am feeling, setting intention, perhaps drinking a lovely cup of coffee as I awaken to the day.

This continues throughout my day as I am on computer a lot, I take breaks to breathe, rest my mind and eyes, check in....even for just a small moment. Creativity cannot sustain itself well, I have found, without some space...

And of course caring for my dog brings a lot.....walking him a few times a day, I notice how it feels to be in a body that day....brushing him patiently brings me to the present.....giving things to him that makes him happy.

Food is also a great time to feel gratitude and commune with life energy, whether it be cooking, eating, growing food. And any exploration in/with for that matter can bring this opportunity for me.

Finally, most reliably in my day, I have found I need a certain amount of time alone, to do nothing at all. All kinds of things unwind in this space for me.

~ Anonymous


Woman on porch photo
Corn photo

Rituals in the Classroom

• We sing a song called “The Earth is Good to Me” before eating dinner
• I usually eat something small but yummy while I read right before bed
• In the classroom, for group well-being we meet at the start of the day to greet and start our work together
• At the end of yoga we think about our intentions for the day at the end of meditation.
• Saying namaste, thanking each other for practicing yoga together.

A frequent wish of mine over the years is that as a [school] community we would have some rituals together for the well-being of the community, like regular assemblies, singing the school song, etc. An updated version of the old rituals of the pledge of allegiance or patriotic songs. We were trying to think- when do we see ourselves (literally) as a whole community at our school?

~ Anonymous

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Gratitude, Prayer, Meditation and Life Affirming Actions

One of the great truth that has changed and continues to change me came from my study with Dr. Angeles Arrien in Calif. She taught me that all traditional people believe that in order to live in a sacred blessing way, you need to have these three practices in your life daily. I call them rituals and express my original medicine with them. They are the practice of GRATITUDE which I take the time once or twice a day as I feed my horses to look around and say thank you for all the wonders etc in my life. The practice of PRAYER and MEDITATION is the second ritual and that is something that is evolving daily with my spiritual and soul growth. The third is to practice LIFE AFFIRMING ACTIONS everyday. This is the fun one as it reflects the first two. As Rumi says, "Let the beauty of what you love, be what you do"....or something like that!!

~ Anonymous

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I Thank God for My Life

I think I have quite a few rituals that I may or may not do each day, however what is probably most important to me is immediately upon waking in the morning I thank God (whatever that means) for my life, for my being, for guiding me, directing me, opening my heart, and bringing me to a greater sense of love and peace. As I am going to sleep at night I thank God for the day, whether it has been a challenge or fun, naming things that happened, seeing my lessons and challenges, and joys and blessings.

Marilyn Robinson


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Wow!! I Do Take Care of Myself With My Rituals

For me… I do a meditation/clearing/intention time each morning consisting of energetically clearing out my house, my office space, and my boyfriend’s house, then putting in white light of the highest vibration into each of these spaces where I spend the most time. Then I call in all helpers/angels etc to assist me for the day (in general and in specific if I am working on something), and then I do the same for my daughter. Sometimes I do it at my altar, other times in bed before I get up.

Currently for the next 2 weeks I am cleaning out my energy field 2x/day after a shaman session I had recently.

I work out 3-4x/week…hike, swim, cardio, weights…

Before I go to sleep I go through the day and get into a space of gratitude for all the things that I enjoyed throughout the day. Occasionally I’ll get to write in my journal.

I have a spiritual book club that I attend 2x/month. I belong to a women’s prosperity circle that we talk 1x/week and do emails during the week to keep our vibration high!

I get Acupuncture (1-2x/month), Massage, Anat Baniel, Chiropractic etc as needed.

WOW!! I do take good care of myself with my rituals!

W.W
Source for Wellbeing


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Sharing New Things Each of Us Learned

Give thanks before every meal, joining hands with all gathered around the table

Bless the car and everyone in it as I begin driving

Bless our daughter, Adonia, each night, cuddle and give thanks for the day and look back at what went well and what could work better another day

Share with each other at supper time what new things each of us learned during that day

Pray/meditate each night before going to sleep, even if just for a short while

Touch in with my husband each evening to get a sense of the next day's flow and how we will weave each of our schedules and rhythms together in mutual support and awareness

Do a cleanse in the spring time -- which includes a yearly wildcrafting of nettles

That's a start for now... wanted to write some down right away before your email scoots too far up in my inbox (another "ritual" I am trying to enact more and more ;-))

~anonymous

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Tea With My Son When He Gets Home

I have been so busy lately that I've dropped many of my healthy rituals. Not a good time for that!! I've even picked up some unhealthy ones recently (playing that colored lines game too often). It's incredible how tenuous our healthy habits sometimes are. A very good lesson for me, though. I try to "have it all together" all the time, and I need to allow myself to sometimes NOT!
I am also trying to show this part to others more regularly, rather than hide behind the "got it all together" and "doesn't get perturbed" masks.

But in this last week of school this quarter I have been turning back toward the healthy ones more. One that I have never dropped is praying before dinner. We go around the table and say what we are thankful for at that moment. It is a great way to slow down, and approach the meal with more presence, intention, and gratitude.

Another ritual is having oolong tea with my son when he gets home from school in the afternoon. It is a nice way to relax and be present together. We also read together most evenings before bed. This is probably one of my favorite rituals. We are currently reading the Chronicles of Narnia together. We both enjoy fantasy stories, and simply lying in bed together at the end of the day before going to sleep.

I have also been playing squash once a week with someone who is right at my level. We have a real good battle with each other!! I push myself very hard, and have a lot of fun in the process. This is my only regular exercise at the moment, but it's nice to have a regular time to meet with someone else to keep me engaged with it.

Rituals that I am currently interested in including more in my life are: coloring and drawing, recording and contemplating my night-time dreams, sitting meditation, playing piano, and creative visualization.

Michael Byrne
Creating Vitality



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Beauty Reminds Me To Be Grateful

My current “ritual” is a beginning practice of gratitude. For the last several weeks I’ve just been using beauty to remind myself to be grateful. Sometimes it is the light out the window, or a quick view of a mountain, or some sprouts coming up in the garden… but I’m taking a moment (when I remember – which has been easier than I imagined) to NOTICE the beauty and to NOTICE a feeling of gratitude. I start with being grateful for being able to appreciate beauty – and then move to something else if I can find it. I take a moment to pause, to appreciate and then “life” resumes again. One thing I notice is that these “moments” seem to be getting more frequent. Maybe it is spring coming … or maybe it is that my noticing has changed.

Anonymous

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A Beauty Walk Each Morning

I’ve been meeting once a week with a small group of friends as we are all wanting to find more balance in our lives and figure we can support each other in doing so. Each week we commit to one thing that will make a difference for us in the coming week.

Each week so far I have committed to the same thing, as I want to really embed it in my body and psyche as an unbreakable habit. Here’s what it is:

I commit to taking a beauty walk each morning, no matter how short, and most importantly I do NOT open ANY email, or even my computer, in the morning until I have at least stepped outside and taken several breaths of fresh air. That’s the bare minimum, but more usually it is a half hour to an hour and a half walk where I notice all the beauty around me and greet it with gratitude and awe.

Amy Lenzo
Beauty Dialogues
Photo by Amy

A 3 Second Ritual

A 3 sec. ritual...
I probably started this about 10 years ago, but the way time flies, swoops and bends it might have been more or less.
In my kitchen at home during the first sip of coffee or tea in the morning and often then the first sip sip of a cold beer in the PM I will “notice” what my eyes are resting on (or I will look at something intentionally) and bless/thank that object and all it’s touched.

Christian Swenson
Human Jazz

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Ritual as a General Way of Life

In the broadest sense, I see each day and each waking moment as a Ritual - an opportunity to ‘practice the presence’ (allowing spirit to bless each interaction - whether this be between humans or between trees, animals, rocks, angels or any other manifestation of the One Life).

For me, each day upon waking I attempt to remember who I am and where I am and what opportunity awaits me during the new day. I always begin with a cup of hot water and 30 minutes of meditation before heading out on an 8-mile neighborhood run (on weekends year-round I run the local Issaquah Alps or the Cascades in the summer months for 3-4 hours to commune with nature). I’m then ready to open emails and have client meetings or go volunteer my time. Whenever I can, I stop and give thanks during the day for the gifts of life and ask that I be shown where I can be of most service and where my next classroom for personal growth is happening.

Although ritual is a form that brings certain qualities and blessings into a focus, it is now more a general way of life. That’s all for now.


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